Here I Come .

Nowadays, i have lost the inspiration to write, to draw, to do anything. Focusing on something more worthwhile. So i'm sorry i havent talked to any of you lately, i really dont feel like it even if i replied im scared i would treat you like i dont know you, i dont feel like replying. But ill say hi one day, im sorry. Its not that im arrogant, its not that i think im 'all that', i just have hard time trusting people. I dont mind being friends tho, but this time right now its just not the time to make one. The year is reaching to an end. And im not complaining, its not like im perfect cause no one is but ive been encountering and meeting people who fight alot with their significant other every.single.day. Well appreciate what you have, you might just lose it the next day. Im uninspired. Im just a terribly disturbed girl looking for a happiness.
Regards, Natasha Amiera.

Lost Hope *sigh*

Chin up Natasha and smile.

Forget the past .

I cnt never change what you already are, so here i am ready to fall once more. I just hope that one day somewhere in your heart, there screams my name wanting to come out. Did i push you to hard? Did i make you turn into someone youre not? Who's wrong or understanding, you'll never understand because what i feel and think doesnt make sense.. im writing all of this cause i just feel like ive made a fool of myself. I dont blame the weather, i dont blame the world. I just feel stupid.

So i thought this is time where I should says goodbye. Cause it will never be the same again.

Im a never ending shame. Sorry if i made you look bad, Dear. My intentions were well. I sticked a note that u ask me to do. I'd bare it on my forehead. I gonna sell my BB even i love it. I'd use my Nokia torchlight as you requested. And im done here. Doing great. Accompanied by a tear. A million tears, trillion and my eye turn to black. Will not argue-ing with you and will not oppose and rebel you.I wont eat until everythings turn and back to normal. Not about protest but it automatically loss appetite. 

Sorry, maybe i wrote too much about you and this is why i cant forget you. The more i wrote about you, the more the hardest to forget you. I'll try. 

TERMINATE MY BRAIN PLEASE ~

I don't want any night to go by
Without you by my side
I just want all my days
Spend being next to you
Lived for just loving you
And baby, oh by the way

Could I hold you for a lifetime
Could I look into your eyes
Could I have this night to share this night together
Could I hold you close beside me
Could I hold you for all time
Could I could I have this kiss forever
Could I could I have this kiss forever, forever.

This just a memory Natasha, erase it ! Delete it ! Throw it away !

Lyrics above just a word and he broke his promise . No need to remembrance. 

Forgot him , He is nothing . He couldnt brang you to a True way .

Stop falling apart Natasha, you're got Nasrul now !

:'(

His Graduation Day

Congratulations! Past 4 days, the 19th of November 2011, you are receiving your diplomas, and can truly call yourselves Masters of your universe. I LOVE YOU . Now he's officially a diploma holder. Nahhh ! Jeles :( Aku pakai baju kurung yang my NA request . Ehem . Dia suka ! A bit bored lah grad dorg but at last sgt TERUJA ! makcik2 and pakcik2 tu semua sporting ! Paling syok parents Farhan Khairi . And dapat jumpa semua kawan2 dia yang before this pernah kecoh dalam Facebook ja . Kenal budak comel Si Najwa Comel. I can see he's smiling since he woke til he fall asleep .

His name Melaka. He's Cute ! 

HAHA

Dunno what else to wrote . No idea . Sorry Bye !

-END-

Rather Single If Everyday is a HURT day

Everything is so messed up as it ever was and false hopes were raised from stray dreams. Underneath it all, underneath the smile, this skin, is an anxious apprehensive fool who just cant stop hoping for you. I am mulling over possibilities. Its not even possible. My laughter and smile only conceal the wreckage within.I am slowly disintegrating.You're gullible, you are desperate at best. All you do is complain "I dont know what i want", "Do not waste". Well did i mention your cries for attention is driving me insane?

The Closet Doll

This doll is designed to recreate the appearance, texture, and weight of the human female and male form. Their primary function is to serve as sex partners. This activity can be accompanied by certain preparations such as dressing them up in different types of clothing, changing wigs or makeup, and even adjusting body temperature by use of electric blankets or baths.

Umm, quite scarily enough, she is not real. She's a "Real Doll." 
Try see this , 18 SX !

The texture of the skin is similar to 99.8% OF THE HUMAN SKIN.
It will last two years if used constantly and consistently every day.
Completely adjustable to any position you want.

ADVANTAGES..

• She does not speak
• She does not get fat
• She never has periods
• She does not pass gas
• She never goes to shopping
• She does not get pregnant
• She does not have a mother
• She never ever gets headaches
• She does not go to the hairdresser
• She does not watch soaps or Oprah
• She does not care what we watch on TV
• She does not frequent internet chat rooms
• She will never get elderly human physical attributes
• She will not get jealous if you bring home another woman
• She will not nag if you go out and she wont care when you return

Actually as a muslim we dont need this such things. It's HARAM ! They doesnt have a feeling which call love. They been created to avoid brothels and human trafficking.

Stop searching or you might die *TEARS*

Sekarang aku sangat2 bengang ! Aku tulis dalam bahasa melayu sebab nak bagi kau baca ! Seems kau TAK PAHAM english ! kau sangat BABI ! BABI pon reti buat perangai elok and senonoh dari kau ! HANCUR ? Serious ! You're the worst man ever in this world ! Kau ingat kau hasut aku then aku nak dengar kau ? Come on dude! Act mature please ! Kau dah 22 tahun this year ! Malu lah dekat budak ! Aku tak terhegeh langsung dekat kau lah ! Sebab aku tahu future aku hancur if aku dengan kau ! Hidup penuh dengan ENJOY ! Yang aku nampak bila hidup dengan kau ARAK ! PEREMPUAN ! DEALER ! MAKAN BABI ! And most is SATANIC than ANGEL ! Lain pulak bila aku dengan Nasrul ! He's amazing ! Dia selalu block aku untuk tinggalkan semua tu ! Even aku salu gaduh dengan dia sebab dia too much concern tapi aku suka makin lama aku dah boleh tinggalkan benda2 haram tu slow and motion ! Sorry Nasrul sebab stuborn . And aku tahu kau sayang aku . Baru aku sedar betapa susahnya kau nak ubah aku without any force and hurt ! And to Hafis , stop spread cerita cinta kau yang x pernah ada ending such as AKU CARI KAU and BEGGING KAU ! Aku geli ! I tak pernah cari kau and kau yang ADD aku ! Yucksss ! Aku happy dengan Nasrul. Even kau dapat aku balik, kau takkan buat aku jadi orang yang suppose aku nak ! Aku setitik rasa sayang pon dah takde dengan kau Hafis . Please back off and get out from my life . Kau tak kacau aku physically but mentally aku rasa tergugat! END!

Air Asam and Ayam Goreng Berempah to him

Yesterday aku masak air asam and goreng ayam berempah to him ! It's not too hard to cooked ! I Made It Man ! Nasrul love it ! Thanks to mama who use to call me all day and teach me how to cook . I LOVE YOU MA :')

-THE END-

*SIGH*

sometimes i feel as if i live under a roof full of actors. A day, theyre nice to me and another day they'll get really angry, mad, in flames... Worst thoughts you can think of. I love my family but sometimes i hate living in the same home. im always the black sheep of the family. I dont look like any of my siblings and somehow my siblings tend to use that fact against me. Its funny at first but that shit gets offensive when i grew older. If anything's broken, the first name to be yelled is mine. to be blame, me. Although i have nothing to do with it. What happened to the fairness of equality? What the fuck happened.

I SHALL STOP BLOGGING :D I post too many emotional stuff. oh yes (realize after 100+ posts) oh no im a happy girl dont worry, i have the best people in my life this time right now, your existence really dont make a difference :B

11.11.11 (11.11am)

FML NA,
Im not hoping but i am holding on, ill keep my words.
This is what i'd promise him.
Trust me for i am keeping my promise.
Theres not much to say, theres nothing left to be done, all whats left is just a girl who's living within her past. She didnt care, she knew this would happen. Those words, those sentences, those phrase shouldve been left unsaid, kept inside like nothing ever happened. The way he turned when she said hello, was deaf by the sound of the freeway, blinded by the lights. It was just a phase, a way that she can get over everything that ever matters. Shit happens just on different days.

Btw, just wanna show off Oakley Atmos that just 50 pieces in whole world !

Happy Eid Dul Adha

maybe you havent heard, yes the fact that im still been controlled by my mom, yes. And so, Im not went out for my Hari Raya. Just stayin at house and sleep whole day. Eat , Sleep , Eat , Sleep and Soooooooo on !

My Non-Stop Posting :)

I think I might just get myself back onto blogger again. I've gotta admit I've always loved the environment here compared to the other blogging sites. So I see I've gained alot of followers after being on hiatus so long. I shall keep this updated from now on! I miss writing, I miss everything. I hope you guys have better days ahead of you...Till then!

Damn Question Ever To Answer !

-Have you ever done something that seemed ludicrous at the time to impress him?

 Sometime. Scared he'd might bored.

-Have you experienced a loss of appetite because he's were not with you?

Yup. Many times. Once before I didnt ate for 3days just because of him.

-Do you have trouble sleeping without he's around?

I have no ideas how to answer this. But sometime I do.

-When you do sleep, are they in your dreams?

I cant control my dream. Im lack of dream dude!

-Can you say things to them you would not say to any other?

Totally :) Always ! Such as "ILY"

-Do you find that certain songs on the radio seem to be written about them or the two of you?

Yup. Terrible Things by MayDay Parade.

-Does a hug or kiss from him really make it all better?

Yeah. This can stop us from argue-ing

-Is he, in your opinion, the most interesting/fascinating person on Earth?

He's Awesome man! Arghhhh Cair! Ang taw dak cair tu apa?

-Would you be willing to lay down your life to save him?

I will ! Rather die together ! Aiseehhhh ayat !

Sunny Sun-Away !

I'm loving how my life is going now. Without any of you interfering my life, I am content. I love the people that is around me. I love my family and the my boy.Apparently this feeling inside me is starting to not hate somebody! Fall In Love for last time :)

i remember each and everyone of the people in my life that i took a photo with, every single goddamned one, that includes you ♥